Thursday, October 16, 2014

DEAR 29, FUTURE LETTER


Last March, I took some time to sit down and write a letter to myself on my next (29th) birthday. Instead of writing a list of goals, I wanted to write to myself as if I had already accomplished my goals. I wrote to myself as I wanted to see myself and planned to read it again today on my actual birthday.

It was a really fun exercise, which I plan to repeat each year. It really put a few areas of my life into perspective. Am I still worrying about what I was worrying about then? What really mattered to me? Does it still matter?


Dear Maureen, 
I am so proud of you. As I see you walk into this coffee shop, I see a woman who is calm and at ease in her own skin. I see someone with kind eyes and a generous spirit who is kind to everyone she meets. 
You are absolutely beautiful Maureen. You skin glows, your hair is longer than it was last year and you have a gentle wave throughout it. Your make-up is subtle but stunning and your eyes light up when you talk about your life.  
You seem really fulfilled in your career. You are busy but you enjoy what you do and feel accomplished by working hard. You have grown in your first year as a Marketing Manager and have really made a name for yourself within your company. You have initiatives that you own and you feel comfortable working with your team and delegating to your junior staff.  
What's more, you have become a mentor. You have learned so much in the past year about being a manager and you are comfortable giving direction and having hard conversations. Your patience has increased substantially and the little things or tight deadlines no longer stress you out. You do not seem anxious at work at all. You are calm, cool, and collected and provide insight and direction to your senior leaders. I am so happy for you that you finally found a career in which you belong and that you have grown so much professionally. 
You are also a woman in love. What a joy it is to look at you and see such love in your eyes. You and Josh are going to be married and I know that you can't wait. Maureen, despite any anxiety you are feeling right now I want to tell you that everything is going to be all right. Josh is a fantastic man and you love him so deeply that no small doubts can shake that. God is watching over you and he has given you the signs you need to feel confident in your decision to marry Josh. You know in your heart of hears that it is the right thing for you and you are so grateful for him in your life.  
Josh's proposal was a dream. He completely caught you by surprise and had you celebrating with all of your friends and family. You know that life with him will be full of love and laughter and I am so glad that you waited for him. You deserve all the love that he is giving you. And he deserves all the love you are giving him. 
You are healthy and strong and confident. You no longer live to accomplish a number on the scale but you are healthy and you exercise daily. You don't feel pressure to eat certain foods but rather nourish your body consistently so you feel good. You look good girl, rock those skinny jeans! 
She is Moments is thriving and you couldn't be happier. You are making money with the blog now and it's providing you with so many new opportunities, you had no idea would come your way. You love working on it and let it bring you joy not stress. You find peace in writing each post and are helping people by sharing your journey in life.  
Your family is wonderful and they love you so much. Everyone is healthy and well and you are so happy you live in DC to be near them. You are so blessed Maureen. What a beautiful 29 years you have lived. I'm so excited to watch you continue to grow and be the wonderful woman you are.  
Love, 
Maureen

Reading the letter now is so interesting. There are some things that I feel I'm doing well and others that I know I need to give less attention to in my life. Here are my reactions:

Appearance
This one is hilarious. My hair is longer, I did curl it today so it's wavy and I actually put on make-up so my skin looks good. That's what having a birthday and going to the office will do to you I guess, I wanted to look extra nice today. In all seriousness though, I am in a place of joy in my life. I really do think my eyes light up when I talk about my life. What a beautiful thing.

Career
As you can tell from the letter above, work takes up a huge chunk of my time and mind space. I am still working in the same job as a marketing manager of a digital agency and for the most part I like it. I am constantly challenged and I have grown here and made a name for myself. That being said, the little things and tight deadlines DO stress me out and I am constantly anxious at work. Just this morning I was talking to my dad and Patti and telling them that I really need to figure out a way to be ok with doing my best and letting it go. Right now I'm in an environment where there is constantly too much to do. Further, I'm a perfectionist, so if I don't do something perfectly I feel like I failed. Well there's no human way to get everything done perfectly here so you can imagine how often I feel like a failure. I need to keep working on weaving in serenity and patience at work.

Love
I. Am. Happy. Pure and simple. Funny that in this letter I anticipated that I would have doubts (though small) about getting married. But I didn't really. Josh is a wonderful husband. I know we'll have challenges throughout our marriage but we'll also have a lot of fun too. Living together and starting our home is FUN!

Body
Wellllllll I'm not sure I can say that I don't care about the number on the scale but I'm working on it. I was in a great exercise routine for the wedding but now have stopped completely. I'm kind of an all or nothing gal. Gonna try to get back into it. I think moderation will be the key word for me in the next year.

Blog
Oh my. "Samsonite. I was way off!" With the amount of energy the wedding and work demanded She is Moments definitely got the short end of the stick. Now that I have the time again, I'm full on scared to blog. Silly I know but this is the perfectionism thing again. I have so many posts I want to put up and am so afraid of not doing them perfectly. The thing I need to remember is that doing them imperfectly is better than not doing them. In the next year, I want to focus on the fun of blogging not the expectation I put on it. And I want to do more collaborations with other bloggers!C

This year, I'll write a letter to myself one year from now to read when I'm turning 30. Sometimes we give ourselves the best perspective on our own lives. :)

1 comment

  1. Happy Belated! Hope you had a great birthday! If you are looking with someone to collab with you know how to reach me ;)

    ReplyDelete

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